I know a lot has happened this week, and I know y’all came here for me to roast this week, but this week? I only have a reflection, best seen and discussed by the 13th studio album by Jay-Z, 4:44, track 6: Family Feud.
As I tell y’all every week, let’s get it!
#ProblematicAF #Cosby #TheFavoritesAreProblematic #RapeCulture # BloggingToOracle #ExposureCulture #DomesticViolence #ThereIsAProblem #KanyeIsSunkye #StayWoke #PayAttention #RedemptionIsComing #ConsciousnessIsConscience #Trauma #DontMinimizeTheTraumaYouDidntExperience #RaiseBetterSons #NasAndKelis #WeAllLoseWhenTheFamilyFeuds
I am a fan of the blog Very Smart Brothas. I adore them. They are my big brothers in blogging, they just don’t know it yet. On Thursday, the site posted an article called, “Life Comes At You Fast and All Your Faves Are Probably Trash.” And it is no secret I have been in love with Nasir olu dara Jones since high school (class of 1999!), and hearing the allegations his ex-wife Kelis put up? I was dumbfounded. I legit had to take in that my most favorite emcee of all time was a fuckboy. I was devastated. On top of Kanye, Cosby and the world around me imploding, it was all too much, bruh. It was all too damn much.
In watching my social media this week, I legit had to remain silent. I saw women with no sexual assault trauma accuse the women in the Cosby case of all lying, being money hungry and problematic if they were paid. I watched women whom I respected in some form or another take subliminal shots at one another. I saw rape culture in action and that hornets nest stir up, and I watched how race played a part in all of this. I decided then what my English PhD dissertation would be. Please see my article #MeToo, Us & Them on Contemptor if about the divisiveness of the #MeToo movement and where it should next go.
With Mr. West? Y’all know how I feel about him, and said so in an early blog this week. See that here if you missed it. So much this week–so so much. However, as I try and be positive for the most of my possession and domination of this corner of the internet, I feel all of me which is maternal stir and whisper. All I can say is this, “We have more together, than we do part.” This right now, the family is fighting. The truth has come out on multiple fronts, legacies are being attacked or tarnished and people are rushing to bandage egos and become internet gangsters. However family, the way we heal is my admitting what is wrong.
The people whom we have idolized, respected, and even loved or supported still have feet of clay. They have a public persona, and a private life. In this voyeuristic culture we live in, there are outlets everyday that allow us to spew or reveal every secret thought we have or reaction to everything we think is unfair. As my mother has said to me since I was 13–“People are people.” Meaning, people are no different than what you believe or make them out to be. They really aren’t. It is our engaging of them, our perception of them which makes these types of situations so devastating when revealed.
Just because someone has money, power and influence doesn’t mean they can’t be raggedy or problematic.
This week has taught me, reminded me exactly what my big brothers in blogging have said, “Life comes at you fast, and all your favorites are probably trash.”