Rachel Megan Markle is getting married today. She is going to marry Prince Henry Charles Albert David, Duke of Sussex.
From the craziness that is social media, I have seen the venom of her having to prove her blackness, to the utter joy that a wedding is happening.
It is the proving of her blackness among other black people, that I find infuriating. How do you as a black person ask another black person to prove their own blackness because they don’t look black?
There was a post on the Facebook page of Kinfolk Kollective that demonstrated such silliness. As a mother of biracial children, whom don’t look black, seeing them struggle with that all the while trying to edify all that is beautiful and black in them–I wasn’t offended, I wasn’t in shock, I felt like I’m sure my foremothers did. In situations like this, as my grandmother said, “All I can do is look.”
I posted my opinion, complete with facts and she responded back with “Nah.” I Kanye shrugged and unfollowed the page. It is her right, the right of all those on social media to post their opinion, but I have a quote, “Don’t let your opinion outpace your intelligence.”
This is one of those cases.
As the mother biracial children, I have told them the secret to survive–the world will always see you as black. Megan’s mother did the same thing I’m sure. As straight as her hair is, as fair as she looks, she’s still a black girl. And always will be.
As a mother, my prayer for Rachel Megan, the Duchess of Sussex, is she never forget who she is. As a mother, I want her to do well, to love her husband, to love and protect the children they will have. I believe Prince Harry will honor and love her–be a soft place for her to fall. I want her to breathe and be. I am aware she will be thrust into a place that is unique to anything she ever experienced. She will be called names, reminded viciously of her blackness, asked to deny it, and at the name time answer for all the crimes of blackness.
It’s bigger than a Facebook group or post. As a mother, I want to protect and encourage her. I want her mother to be present always, so she can be free to cry and be a little girl with the world saps her Black Girl Magic is leaking as fast as her eyes.
There is a mystique to black women. There always will be. There is a nature indomitable to us which makes people think we are indestructible–but we just take longer to crack. Sometimes we need our mothers to remind us we won’t die in change, sorrow, heartbreak or suffering.
To Rachel Megan Markle, Duchess of Sussex, the little black girl from Crenshaw, my prayers are with you. I pray your strength like never before. I pray for your inner circle, your household staff, valets and even that your phone never be stolen.
I send you the love that black women harbor and pour into their daughters. I send you the belief to be your own person, to be a wife and mother, to become and remain your own woman.
Rachel Megan, show them who you are and let no one take any piece of blackness from you.