Repeat after me:
A cocoon is where you change.
A catacomb is a maze of where other dead things are.
A tomb is where all dead things remain.
Change is never going to be easy. There is no shortcut to becoming something that you were not. There will never be such a shortcut. The thing is, the trick is, the quickest way to change is to change your mind.
However, once your mind is made up, you have to understand–there are things that will have to die, must die, remain dead, in order for you to live. This includes relationships, old thought processes and all the other weights. They have to die, stay dead for you to get to your cocoon–to get your place of change.
What are you willing to give up?
The flipside to this is after you have made up your mind (the first thing), the next thing that will happen is people will immediately say is ‘you’ce changed.’ The motivational speaker Lisa McNichols says is this way: you have to risk what other people may and will think of you in order for change to occur. One of the YouTubers I have followed for the last six years, Shira (SugarfreeTV/Synchronisity Studios), says you have to risk being alone. Also what she called, ‘the ugly phase.’
The ugly phase is where you transition from where you are, towards where you want to be. When your direction shifts, especially from people whom have only known you as one way, cannot stomach you becoming something more than what they are.
For me, my process looked like this. My father died when I was 17. I decided I would honor my Dad and become a doctor, but it didn’t feel right (tombs/catacomb). When I decided to forgo nursing school, and med school aspirations, I concentrated on writing. Making this my career doing something that my own father didn’t believe I could do or should so. I have lost friends, close relationships, and I’ve been questioned more than I’d say here. As success came, the smaller my circle became. (Cocoon)
This process isn’t linear. Sometimes it is cyclic.
Remember our mantra from earlier, and let’s add this.
Cocoons are made from with you, for you, and incubates and pushes you towards change and the changes you desire to make. The only person whom can facilitate and maintain these changes is you.
Catacombs are a maze of tombs, these places filled with dead things that do not speak to you. They cannot help you. All they can do is remind you of what was, and what cannot be again.
Tombs are memorials to dead things. No more and no less. You cannot be bound to these things; more often than not we are bound to the expectations of dead things. Including people. Especially, people.
This trifecta can either fuel your change, you shield you from it. Which will you do? For me, the death of my father made me want to be better in all forms. I was torn from being a doctor, really considering med school—to finding a home (again) in writing–the thing he didn’t think that I could do.
[image from tripadvisor.in