Audre Lorde called self-preservation (self-care) a revolutionary act. Everything in the current culture tells women in order to be perfect you have to be self-sacrificing. Almost to the point of extension.
What we forget is a simple adage:
You cannot pour from an empty cup.
Walking through this world takes from you. It drains you. People test, abuse, underestimate, misunderstand, distress and oppress each other and themselves everyday. If you cannot find a way to counteract that consistent onslaught, there will be none of you left for you.
You need you too!
When I say one needs to fill their cup from the fountain and not the tap, I mean you need to go to the source! Whatever thing that you do, see, that refuels you: do that on a regular basis.
This could be anything from a hot shower, window shopping to downloading the lastest on Audible or Apple Music. The goal of self care is to me as authentic, as honest, as you feel you have to be for your own well-being. It puts you at the forefront for a moment; being sensitive to your own needs and wants. Filling from a fountain is something which is, will be, more lasting. Something of a holistic benefit. On weary days, or days where I feel as though I can do no more (and the walls just might close in!), I find the sun. In the summer this is easy. But in the winter? I cook. I try new recipes. I bake!
The fountain things, those refillings are from things you know to be true about yourself. The things you like, care about or do despite what people think—or who is around. The fundamental, unchanging parts of who you are. The world outside your door seeks to destroy and warp that.
Every single day.
Refill those things. Remember those things. Do those things.
I love looking good, fresh nails and cute outfit as much as the next girl. But a good book, a nap, or 10 minutes in the sun don’t hit quite the same.
[images from Pinterest and authors own library]