Life is unavoidable. Remember my quote from J.M. Barrie. Here, make it your screen saver or lock screen-
Today, right now, I want you to think about the things you wanted, and the things that may have wanted you more. I want you to take a quick inventory of you life.
I promise you, this is not as scary as it sounds. You can do this on a piece of paper, in your head, or as you do it on a bathroom/smoke/coffee break.
As you make this list, I want you to break these events/moments up into the following categories.
I. Hits. II. Misses. III. Miscellaneous.
I. Hits. These are the things that have happened to you that either (1) you caused, (2) you had a hand in causing, or (3) you suffered the fallout of. These can be things you were born into (family dynamics are good for this), poor life decisions (I have more than a few of these)–the things that you wish you could redo or never do again. These are the things you wish that someone else would have warned you about. Things that took more than retweets and loans for gas money to fix.
Hits take time to recuperate from.
The most irreplaceable thing you will ever have–is time.
II. Misses. These are the things life saved you from. The wrong job. The wrong relationships. The listening to what my Mom called ‘your first mind’ or ‘the something told me.’ These are the things which are two fold. On one hand, it looks like you are missing out on something; it looks desirable and appealing. However, when you look deeply, wait a while, test the waters, what you desire—is not what you will truly want. Or need. These are the thing you would have needed rescue from–and didn’t know it.
III. Miscellaneous. This is the stuff that I overheard Bishop T.D. Jakes calls ‘the stuff you learn along the way.’ These are the things you never would have known about had you not lost something. Or not having some handed to you, or that you had to work to get–or maintain it. These are the things which are invaluable, and are the makings of wisdom. These are the things which cannot be bought, nor paid for.
The things that are in your Miscellaneous box? These are wins, beloveds. These are all wins.
Now, look at your list. Look at it close. Remember things you had no control over and suffered because of it. Think about the things you decided to do, believing the best would be wrought from it! Think about the risks you took, or didn’t take. Think about the things you thought best not to do, and the fallout those decisions had. Now, consider all that you learned when you where in the midst of a hit or miss. These dearest ones, all these experiences, add to you. Character. Soul. Strength.
The best thing? If you don’t like your story at present, you have time and power to change it. If you feel lead to do so, do it expeditiously.
Be grateful for the story you are writing, dear ones. For it is your story. Be grateful, Torches. What you thought was the worst thing, may have been the best. What you thought would kill you, didn’t. And the things that you thought you needed? You don’t.
Be grateful for the things you have, Torches.
Be grateful for the things you don’t either, Torches.
Success is not always measured in what you acquire. It can also be measured in what you were able to let go of.