This week’s advice from our own Jaiyda. Let the kids know, sis! -JBHarris
Taken from the Twitter account of HBCU Confessions (SU-Southern University):
Girl! I can’t tell you how many times I’ve ran into these situations! Guys are just as difficult as they claim women to be. They have a hard time listening and comprehending when it comes to us explaining that just being friends is best or all that us ladies want. First things first though: you have to be very clear on your boundaries even when having casual conversation.
I’m not saying to be overbearing and immediately come out with all of the things you do or don’t want out of a guy and the relationship you may acquire with them. I’m saying to be pretty simple in responses that may come off as flirtatious towards you. I know it’s hard sometimes because you just want to be kind and respectful, but this’ll stop a lot of hurt for all parties involved later on.
I know what you’re thinking next too: “I don’t even feed into anything or flirt back!” I know, I know! Most times we never do, that’s why it’s easier to explain that you just aren’t that girl in these situations: the girl that’s gonna change their mind with a little bit of convincing.
Be very stern in a lot of the things you say, and things you do. When guys see that you’re a woman of your word they won’t even bother. They’ll realize the chase is pointless. Overall though, any guy who can’t respect the reasons you just want a friendship, isn’t your friend to begin with. They always wanted more and they always will so let them fade and accept where it ends!
Male best friends come naturally, trust me, and they’ll be around forever with no hidden agenda! They’ll just be around because they enjoy getting on your nerves!