I came up with this quote two years ago when encouraging a friend of mine who is raising kids, trying to raise kids with a silly, bitter woman. I told … Continue reading 28 (29) Days Of Blackness: My Dream For Black Boy Joy-Teach The Princes How To Be Kings
Category: Unapologetic Blackness
28 (29) Days Of Blackness: Black Lives Matter-Stories Untold: Life After Stroke
Black Lives Matter extends beyond hashtags alerting to police murder. Heart disease is the top cause of death for African American men. Mrs. Lorie Flegler, wife of Dennis Flegler, has … Continue reading 28 (29) Days Of Blackness: Black Lives Matter-Stories Untold: Life After Stroke
28 (29) Days Of Blackness: Supermodel of the Winnie Harlow Sort
Chantelle Whitney Brown-Young is gorgeous. I remember her being on America’s Next Top Model. The first thing I noticed was her face. I have seen children and people with vitiligo, … Continue reading 28 (29) Days Of Blackness: Supermodel of the Winnie Harlow Sort
28 (29) Days Of Blackness- The Dirty Side Of Black Girl Magic: Being The Only Black Girl In The Room
In this age of full-throttle Black Girl Magic, it is important to know that racism, stereotyping, abundant microaggressions and sexism are still viable venom in the life of Black folk. … Continue reading 28 (29) Days Of Blackness- The Dirty Side Of Black Girl Magic: Being The Only Black Girl In The Room
RUNITBACK FRIDAY-02/21/2020
Nina Simone would have been 87 today, Sidney Poitier is 93, Russia is trying to get over again, the coronavirus is spreading, Bill Barr is nervous and looking like a … Continue reading RUNITBACK FRIDAY-02/21/2020
29 Days Of Blackness: Respect My Melanin!
Welcome to Black History Month. When I say welcome, I sincerely mean that. Due to some of you seem to act like Black, POC (person/people of color), African Americans, “ethnic”, … Continue reading 29 Days Of Blackness: Respect My Melanin!

28 (29) Days Of Blackness-Black Girls Get It Done: Remembering The 6888th Central Postal Delivery Battalion
“If the Black woman wasn’t born, she’d have to be invented.” -Nikki Giovanni This is the glorious thing about Black History Month. You find these gems, hidden and fabulous within … Continue reading 28 (29) Days Of Blackness-Black Girls Get It Done: Remembering The 6888th Central Postal Delivery Battalion
28 (29) Days Of Blackness: When TV Looks Back At You–Representation Matters
This piece is dedicated to the beautiful Ja’Net DuBois (1945-2020). Good Night, Willona. Love, Errebody. -JBHarris It seems unfair that Ja’Net Dubois died on Toni Morrison’s 89th birthday, and she … Continue reading 28 (29) Days Of Blackness: When TV Looks Back At You–Representation Matters
29 Days Of Blackness-Looking For Struggle Love: I Hate The Love That I Deserve

I’ve concluded that I hate the love that I deserve.
It sounds insane, but the more I reveled in the mess of the insanity I realized a lot of the Black women around me do too. This realization has came over the lovely Valentine’s Day weekend where the beautiful movie The Photograph starring Issa Rae, and LaKeith Stanfield rocked the Box Office. It seems like right after the debut of the movie timelines were littered with critiques like:
“That’s it?”
“There was no climax!”
“It was so boring!”
I didn’t get it! The movie was beautiful: the movie was straight to the point, there was love between Black people without heartache like we had after Queen & Slim.

Struggle love is what we see so often that anything healthy is–seen as foreign.
It wasn’t making sense…until that same night I got home with my boyfriend, and took in all the small things he had done for me–that night!–that I tried to reject; the small things he had done for me this month that felt like he had gone out of his way to do. I thought it was merely just things you do for folks you loved.
I keep replaying how much I rejected these small (but very large in principle) things, the same way viewers were rejecting simple love between Black people, love without violence, love with small affirmations, vulnerable love. We rejected what was more than deserving for two people, and we do it in our own lives too.
I can’t express how much my heart keeps aching, thinking about how we as women can constantly reject simple love; passionate and deserving love; to continue a cycle that we’re more used to, and that seems more ‘practical’ than accepting what is or is not healthy. What is for us, what is comforting in nature, what is fulfilling in spirit all to keep running back a broken tired ole story of “Black love”. We are so used to the pain of trying to be loved, of ‘being in love’ or some climatic event that either blows a couple apart of keeps them together.
I hate it.
No, not the love that I deserve, but I hate the fact we as women reject what is healthy because it is so foreign to some of us! I hate us not just loving our beautiful brown love, I hate how our self-sabotaging ways–just to be able to tell ourselves “I knew it was too good to be true!”. I want us to love love. I want us to want to fold laundry for someone (because there’s no truer love of course). I want us to let our feet be rubbed. I want us to accept the small, and large tokens of love.
I want to love the love that I deserve.
[images from comingsoon.net and dailybeast.com]
28 (29) Days Of Blackness: Cultural Conversation #4-Pay The People Who Move You…With…Food?
A humorous take on a cultural phenomena. Relax! It’s Black History Month! -JBHarris When we were growing up, one of the worst things to do was pack. I hated packing. … Continue reading 28 (29) Days Of Blackness: Cultural Conversation #4-Pay The People Who Move You…With…Food?